“You are amazing. And no matter what,
you deserve to be loved.”
Let me start by saying you’re amazing. When it comes to love, well, love is love is love. No matter what you’ve been through, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be loved like the world begins and ends with you. It doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve to be happy. To be loved. To make a fresh start and live your life fulfilled.
© Sarah Doughty
2018
It’s never too late to start.
“And I hope you know how much
I wish things could have been.”
There is just something
about the calm of night.
It speaks to me
like a breath on the wind.
And sometimes.
Sometimes, I whisper back
in hopes that you’ll hear them
and know how much
I wish things could have been.
© Sarah Doughty
2018
What could have been.
“It was you. You hit me like a tidal wave.
There was no going back. And I was okay with that.”
It was you. You hit me like a tidal wave. I spent my whole life trying to find my way, but I was just stumbling. One day, just like the flip of a switch, the lights turned on. There I stood, right in the middle of a crowded room. I didn’t know how, but I could sense you were nearby. My future. When I spotted you, it was like the world paused for an instant. I saw you and those eyes of yours. I was spellbound by their depths. Like the ocean couldn’t compare to the blue that shone through them. But it wasn’t just your eyes, it was everything about you. It was like you were waiting for me too. Right then, I knew, there was no going back. I never wanted to. And I was okay with that.
© Sarah Doughty
2018
You swept me off my feet
and I didn’t mind.
“And darling, I have no words.
How can I possibly tell you
how much you mean to me?”
I’m not sure words can ever express how much you mean to me. Not just for being the person you are. But for everything you’ve done for me. Everything you’ve sacrificed. Everything you stood for, and held me up when I couldn’t stand on my own two feet. You’ve been there. Through the good. Through the bad. Through it all, you’ve been a solid structure I’ve needed to keep myself from drowning. And darling, I have no words. How can I possibly tell you how much you mean to me? How can I possibly tell you that you’ve saved me over and over again? And that I’m here, following my dreams, because of you?
With every beat of my heart and every breath that I take, I remind myself that you gave me the strength to survive. And I may not have known you back then, but I knew you were out there, waiting for me. You, my love, have always been my strength. I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I’m the lucky one.
© Sarah Doughty
2018
I’m the lucky one.
“Because, darling, I’ll make my way back to you.
If it’s the last thing I do, I’ll find a way.”
Maybe this is how it’s all supposed to be. If you believe in fate, that is. I got lost inside myself. Trapped in a prison within my head. Thoughts never ending. Never slowing down. Never allowing me to be who I am. But I’m determined. Can you see it? This determination in my eyes? If we are meant to be, we will be again. I have to believe that. And I hope you’ll still be there, waiting for me. Because, darling, I’ll make my way back to you. If it’s the last thing I do, I’ll find a way back to you.
© Sarah Doughty
2018
Wait for me, please.
I’m coming.
“When I feel your heart beating,
I know I am yours.”
I’ve always wondered how to define the difference between living and existing? I wonder if I’ve spent most of my life existing, rather than truly living. But in those calm moments when I feel your heart beating, I’m reminded that, if nothing else, I’ve lived. I’ve known love. I’ve known sacrifice. I’ve known pain, joy, guilt, passion, and everything in between. So how could I say I’ve merely existed? I’ve done so much more than that. I feel it in your heartbeat. I hear it in your voice.
That is how I know I’m living. That is how I know I’m so much more than a simple being. I am yours. I am always yours.
© Sarah Doughty
2018
Yours, for my whole existence.
“Because you, my love,
you’ve shown me unconditional love.”
A wise friend told me that to be free of my body’s prison I need to first embrace myself and truly connect with all the parts of me. The good. The bad. The ugly. Even the ones I wish would remain in the shadows. Though I’m not entirely sure how I will accomplish this feat, I know I’m going to try. If I can learn to understand why I am a prison, then maybe I can learn to pick a few locks and be. Truly. Free.
And that is what I want. With you. For me. For the future. Because you, my love, you’ve shown me how I deserve happiness. You’ve shown me unconditional love. It’s about damned time I do the same in return.
© Sarah Doughty
2018
You remind me of my strength,
I might as well put it to good use.
“I’m thankful that I finally
have my piece of heaven.
I’m thankful that I have you.”
You see, it’s the guilt that gets me. The moments I feel like I cheated death. Those are the ones that haunt me.
Sometimes I think I’ve been living on borrowed time. Like maybe, I wasn’t supposed to live beyond those early years. And if I didn’t, I wonder if this is some kind of afterlife. Either way, I’m thankful for what I have. I’m thankful that I finally have my piece of heaven. I’m thankful that I have you.
© Sarah Doughty
I’m thankful that I have you.
“Because you were my dream come true
and I didn’t want the spell to end.”
A touch of magic was all I needed. Because you were my dream come true and I didn’t want the spell to end.
Maybe that was what made me want to hold on to you like my life depended on it. You were everything to me, and I couldn’t bear to lose you.
© Sarah Doughty
2018
I don’t ever want to lose you.
“Oh darling, believe me when I say
you will love again.”
Oh darling, believe me when I say you will love again. It’ll happen slow, little by little every day. You may not even notice it. And then it’ll feel like drowning. Drowning in love for this person. Someone that deserves your heart. Your soul. All of you.
One day, you’ll find someone that loves you like I love you.
© Sarah Doughty
2018
Because, my love, I do.
I love you.
Sarah Doughty 