Poetry

Steps I Take

“And with each step I took,
I knew it was bringing me
closer to you.”

In that very moment, I was lost without a care in the world. At last, I could see the blazing hues of desiccated and crumbling leaves blanketing the ground. As they crunched beneath my feet, I was pulled toward something I couldn’t name. It should have bothered me, but it didn’t. Despite the darkness around me, I could see unlike I ever could before. With the chill in the air and the scent of wood smoke wafting with it, I never felt more at home before. And with each step I took, I knew it was bringing me closer to you.

© Sarah Doughty

How could I ever be afraid of that?

Poetry

Appreciation

“‘What if no one appreciates me?’
But darling, what if they do?”

Being a creator isn’t for the faint of heart. It takes courage to let others see. You ask, “What if no one appreciates my art?” Because what if they don’t like it? What if the world scoffs at something you poured your heart into? You’d feel like a failure.

But darling, what if they don’t? What if you find people that do love what you create? Wouldn’t it be worth it? That’s why it feels so freeing once your art is out there for other eyes to see. You won’t always find the ones that love you. But you will find your tribe. You will. Don’t give up on your dream.

© Sarah Doughty
2018

This piece is dedicated to everyone
that aspires to create art.
Do it. Share it. Don’t give up.

Poetry

Underflowing

“Have I ever mentioned how
you make me feel?
Like I’m whole.”

Have I ever mentioned how you make me feel? The way your body behaves like a magnet, pulling me towards you. And it’s subtle. Like a current beneath waves. I allow it to carry me towards you and the closer I come to you, I feel more whole than ever before. I don’t mind that I have no lifeline, because that’s exactly what you are to me.

© Sarah Doughty
2018

Who needs a life jacket when I have you?

Poetry

Burden Of Fault

“I knew with resounding clarity
that the burden of fault
was not mine to bear.”

The crushing weight of reality came crashing down upon me. Its unrelenting grip with gravity at war with every part of my being. It pulled me down. Forced the air in my lungs to rush out of me in a jolt of ragged breath. It buried me in debris — the evidence — of truth. I was nothing more than a bystander at the whim of a cruel world that took far too much from me, giving karma itself a bad name. I knew with resounding clarity that the burden of fault was not mine to bear. It never was.

© Sarah Doughty

The fault was never mine.

Poetry

This Haunting

“You haunt me. Every single night
in my dreams, I see you.”

You haunt me. Every single night in my dreams, I see you. Beyond my reach. But I still see you. I see the smile that reaches your eyes. I see the stress, gone from your shoulders. And you look content. Happy. It’s such a strange sight, because I never saw it when you were with me.

© Sarah Doughty
2018

If only I saw that side of you while I was awake.

Poetry

Heroes Vs. Villains

“Sometimes I wonder if I’m
the hero or the villain in my story.”

Sometimes I wonder if I’m the hero or the villain in my story. I know what I’ve survived. I know what I’ve overcome. And I know what demons I still need to fight. But I also know what kind of mark I’m leaving upon my loved ones.

I know I can’t show my love like a normal affectionate person. I know how sometimes any light or sound will make my head feel like exploding. I know my anxiety can make me restless and lose my temper. So I do wonder. Am I a hero for overcoming, but with a few flaws. Or am I the villain, for not being the person I should be for the ones I love?

© Sarah Doughty
2018

Either way, I’m not without flaws.

Poetry

Yours And Mine

“It was perfect.
Because I was with you.
And you were with me.”

I watched your silhouette through a backdrop of flickering flame. Through the crackling, popping, and undulating of shadows, I couldn’t help but be caught by it. Like I was spellbound, captivated and not a care in the world could stop me from reveling in that moment. It was perfect. Because I was with you. And you were with me. Despite that darkened silence, I knew I was home.

© Sarah Doughty

And that could never change.

Poetry

Dangerous Beauty

“You were a perfect storm.
And I wanted you like nothing
I’d ever felt before.”

It was the hunger in your eyes that caught my attention. There was something about you. Like even the air around you knew you were in charge. It was the respect of everyone around you. It was the way you carried yourself. Like you’d earned every bit of your ruthless reputation. And you knew it.

Maybe it was the way your eyes slid over me like a caress. Maybe it was countless generations of instincts running through me. Whatever it was, I knew you were a perfect storm. A mixture of dangerousness, grace, and beauty. A shark. A lion. A predator. And I wanted you like nothing I’d ever felt before.

© Sarah Doughty
2018

Oh, how I wanted you.

Poetry

Inevitability

“And then. I knew what it meant
to fall in love.”

And those eyes were like a beacon. Drawing me toward it like a moth to flame. Those blue flames shimmered behind your eyes, mesmerizing me. Holding me captive. In that moment, I knew beauty for the first time. I couldn’t help it. I didn’t want to. Everything about you held me in a trance and I didn’t want to look away for fear the spell would be broken. And then. I knew what it meant to fall in love.

© Sarah Doughty

It felt like inevitability.

Poetry

Adrift

“No matter what I do, silence follows me.
And I fear I’m drifting away.”

Words hang off the top of my tongue but there’s no air to make a sound. These words howl in my head as they claw at the surface like caged animals trying to escape. No matter what I do, silence follows me. Lacking the willpower to speak my mind and say honestly what I want or need, it feels as though I’m further separating myself from everything around me. Like a vessel with no sail or engine, completely at the whim of the current. Only, I have no idea how to stop or change this course.

© Sarah Doughty

Perhaps I am destined
to be lost.