Poetry

Grounded

“You to keep me grounded, reminding me
that I’m right where I’m supposed to be.”

It’s been days since I’ve slept and the very foundation of my reality is shifting. I’m seeing the cracks between worlds now that my weary eyes aren’t focusing on what’s right in front of me. My skin, muscles, and sinew no longer feel just the gravity beneath me. I’m feeling a breeze where there should be none. I’m hearing whispers where there are no mouths to speak. I’m feeling the rain when I’m not outside. I am dreaming, yet I am awake. And the longer this lasts, the more I feel like I’m detaching from my body. Floating away with the storm. So, this is me. At my lowest. When I’m hyperaware and yet numb at the same time. Who knows how long I will remain in this realm of in-between? But I try not to worry about anything. Because I have you to keep me grounded. To remind me that I’m right where I’m supposed to be.

© Sarah Doughty
2018

This is how insomnia feels.
What is insomnia like for you?

9 thoughts on “Grounded”

  1. I recently read that you should cross your eyes while your eyes are closed. It’s meant to help you fall asleep. Thankfully, it’s not something I had to try out.

    What is your process? I see this was written in 2018. Has the whole thing been written then, or was it only the beginning and then you expanded on it now?

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    1. My issues with insomnia persist, but luckily these bouts of days with no rest are few and far between. This entire piece was written at that time, and though I wasn’t quite hallucinating anything truly coherent, it was still a strange experience.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I’ve never suffered from insomnia so I have no idea. I could never understand why someone can’t just go to sleep when they’re tired. I fall asleep regularly at my computer keyboard and when I wake up I can keep going again for hours…

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    1. Sometimes I just can’t shut off my brain. I think and think, moving from one topic to the next and often coming back to previous ones. Other times, my anxiety is enough that my body will fidget and I’ll move around to force my body to stay alert. It was a defense mechanism I used as a child and it just seems to stick with me.

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      1. Ever tried doing yoga or yogurt or whatever. Some people swear by it, I swear at it (kidding!) but it’s a thought, right? Just a thought, not an endorsement, I’d never have the patience to endure a yoga yogi eating yogurt in a yurt.

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