Coming Back

“My love, I’ve been lost so long.
But, if you’ll have me,
I’ll find my way back to you.”

I’m sinking again. Lost. Can you hear me —no, can you feel me? Sometimes I think I’ve sunk so low that there’s nothing left of me but a voiceless wailing. Sometimes I think I’ve gone invisible, and no matter how long I beg — or how loud — you don’t hear me. And I suppose I don’t have anyone to blame but myself. You see, I was too afraid to let you in. That my fears and vulnerabilities only made me weak, and who would want someone like that? Before I realized what happened, my self-imposed isolation sealed my fate. All I can think now, is why couldn’t I let you in? Completely. So I guess what I’m saying is, no matter what happens, I’m grateful for you. For everything you were, and everything you are. And if it’s too late for me, I want you to know you were the love of my life. You are my life.

If you’ll have me, I’ll find my way back to you. And this time, I’ll let you in.

© Sarah Doughty

My love, I’m coming back.

Tomorrow is the start of
November Notes.
Are you ready?