I once knew what it felt like to love,
before it withered into dust and memories.
I prayed for anything to restore
what was lost, but nothing answered.
Then, just to end my torment,
I ate my own heart.
© Sarah Doughty
For the #MayBookPrompts – Eat, Pray, Love
Wow… Intense ending. I could feel it through your words…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much!
LikeLike
This is so good! The pain in that last line is immense and yet it seems inevitable because of the lines that came right before. Thank you for this!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ah, thank you! 😊
LikeLike
Kick ass. This is one of those rare times when an entire story that could be a lifetime long is told so succintly with so little. Spare and perfect. Not that it matters but this kind of writing inspires, impresses and embarrasses me. More of that Word Ninja business.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Why does it embarrass you? 😐
LikeLike
I wrote a post once about how women have the ability to write a novel in between their words, and how much women say with so little. A sort of amazing female haiku. You just nailed it. It took me a long time to see that and appreciate it, the depth in female brevity. The embarassing part is that for many centuries with the written word men have been trying to write the right poem, find the right words, we go on for stanzas and days. Some women, on the other hand, seem to be able to, as you have done, nail it with very little. It is embarassing in that I could work a long time and come up short (or way too long) writing what you posted. See how long winded that all was? Had I said “Because it’s amazing and ‘I wish'” would it be the same? Probably, to a woman. To a man?
LikeLiked by 2 people
I see your point. However, I spent over a year working on micropoetry, specifically ‘one liners’. In the beginning, I was terrible. But over time I started getting better. I left more to the imagination, left hidden mean by carefully choosing my words, rather than telling someone in detail, exactly what I want them to see. In fiction, it’s a little more precise than poetry, since you want readers to know what’s going on in someone’s mind. Give it a try. See if you can’t take a relatively complicated thought into just one sentence. Leave a bit out, and set the tone with the words you choose – light or dark, happy or sad, etc.
LikeLiked by 1 person
oh my! that last line is just! wow!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ah, thank you! 😊 😊 😊
LikeLike
This was really good, and sad. Wonderful work!
LikeLiked by 2 people
thank you so much!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow, Sarah!👏🏽
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you!😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
eat your heart out indeed *tips hat* good poem I found it sad for some reason.
LikeLiked by 2 people
It is sad. Beneath it all, it was more bearable to devour the heart than to let it continue with so much pain.
LikeLiked by 1 person
And thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have done this.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Ah, sorry to hear that.
LikeLike
Yes, and yes. Your brilliance astounds. Still hungry? Want mine too? ❤ ❤ ❤
LikeLiked by 2 people
Run it through a warm room. 😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lol!! 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Did it taste…how you imagined? Any seasoning on it? Fried? Roasted? lol…I’ll stop there.
LikeLiked by 3 people
Ha! It was warm and juicy, like a filet mignon. 😂
LikeLiked by 2 people
lol.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Wonderful piece – with such a twisted ending – it’s brilliant! (And I think a fitting commentary on the book’s title! Oh, how so non p.c. of me – oh dear 😉 )
LikeLiked by 4 people
Thank you! 😊 I really appreciate that!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow, excellent use of the prompt!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks so much! 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Nice ending:D
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks so much! 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Loved the last line the most!!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks so much! 😊
LikeLike
Brilliant ending Sarah…and drops into my own thoughts and genres….so glad I found your blog 😊
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh my–fabulous writing–what a zinging end!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you! 😊 😊
LikeLike
Most welcome.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Oh, this is so great. I love it! 💙
LikeLiked by 3 people
Thank you! 😊 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow, what a finale. Straight out of the Hannibal Lector’s cookbook. Good one.
LikeLiked by 4 people
Haha, yep. That was the vibe I was going for. 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person